When I was with my husband we were always on a budget. We would have to be on an “austerity program” as he called it. He worked ten hour days and still we could never get ahead. Our budget was always being blown. At times, I thought he blamed me even though I contributed quite a bit of money to the household. We just never went a month without some kind of new debt.
I know most people have this issue to worry about. It is the way of the world and can be a never-ending struggle. My husband used to say he wanted to make enough money so he wouldn’t have to take crap from anyone. Somehow he thought if he was a financial success nothing else would matter. He hated being reminded of his own mediocrity and refused to hear about people who were achieving more than he did. Being with that kind of person made it difficult to look past our money problems. When I was with him I was always reminded that we were not okay. That is a hard way to walk around life, feeling like you are not good enough. After a while I started to think of myself as a failure too.
Now that we are apart, I refuse to look at my triumphs in life solely based on my economic situation. Money makes life easier but it does not guarantee happiness. Happiness is accepting yourself as you are.
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