Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Valentine’s Day: You either Love it or you Hate it

Valentine’s Day, synonymous with love and romance, is once again bombarding us with all things red and pink remotely associated with amore and desire. Sandwiched between Christmas and St. Patrick’s Day, it has become one of the most commercialized days of the year. A frenzy that takes hold of the country every year leading up to the 14th of February:  from cards to flowers, teddy bears to underwear, chocolates to jewelry, and not to mention red balloons labeled, “For the one I love this Valentine’s.”
You are probably loving it if you are in a relationship. For many singles, however, who don't have the prospect of being showered with cards or affection, V-Day can be a red flag and feel like a very lonely day.  
If you are single, the world suddenly seems to exist only of happy couples. So how to find your soul mate? That’s the $64,000 question. Lucky the ones who found their mate in school! At a later stage in life and if you’re divorced or widowed, it becomes more difficult. You may have tipped your toes in the dating pool and experienced that dating rules have changed over time.
Why is it so difficult these days to meet somebody in spite of all the possibilities that social networking and the Internet provide: dating sites, chat-rooms, and singles events? Even churches organize singles nights now. Jacksonville and beaches have so much to offer!  Still you can be out on dates every other night, yet not find that elusive partner.
As a former matchmaker in Ireland my advice to singles is to stay open to what life has to offer you, to explore new avenues and hobbies; to be proactive and go out and mingle. You may have to leave your comfort zone a little. Even if you don’t meet the person you are looking for straight away, you won’t meet anyone when you stay at home. Although it may be hard to find the time and energy- especially when you work and have children to look after- to get out of the house and away from your TV. Fate doesn’t come knocking on your door and serve Mr. Right/Ms. Right on a silver platter – nor does the pizza delivery man. So plan to spend some time every week out of the house socializing and structure whatever free time you have accordingly.
Ask yourself:  Are you ready for a new relationship?  Are you carrying around baggage from your last relationship? Another piece of advice is to have a good look at yourself as seen through the eyes and mirror of a prospective partner: Are there areas in your life or about yourself that could be improved on? Do you know how you come across to other people? In short: Would you date yourself? Make some modest changes if necessary.This may be an unexpected approach but be of help in your search.  
For more tips on dating check out my book Next Time Lucky: How to Find Your Mr. Right which is a story based on my own experiences both as a dating expert and pioneer online dater. Available in paperback and as an eBook on and Barnes & Noble.

(Pictures courtesy of a brilliant website you need to check out!)


  1. Oh Siggy, Valentine's Day is fabulous for lovers. For the single crowd, it truly must be awful.

    The tips you have shared are great. Many single people are shy and keep to themselves. They have to take the bull by the horn by putting themselves out there.

    Great post, Siggy. I wish you a romantic Valentine.

    1. Same to you, but I know positively that you're having one brilliant day!

    2. You bet, I did. I had a romantically sweet day. Thank you. I hope you did too.