50 Shades of Grey: A Female Fantasy?

I'm not into Erotica; so I wasn’t enamored with reading  Fifty Shades of Grey by E.L. James like everybody else.  To me it smacked too much of Marquis de Sade's Story of O which I absolutely detest. However, as the author of a somewhat racy book (Next Time Lucky: How to Find Your Mr. Right), I felt compeled to find out what the big hype was all about and why this book is selling better than mine. A slight understatement!

In fact, the trilogy now comes in a “Fifty Shades Trilogy" box set , has been translated in 52 languages worldwide and sold more than 90 million copies in e-book and print—making it one of the biggest and fastest-selling book series ever. It is called the phenomenon behind the film that just hit the movie theaters fittingly around Valentine’s Day. Needless to say it’s already the biggest movie of the season –which season? They can’t mean the Oscar Season.

To give you the anticipated result first: I did not find out. The hero or villain ─depending on your point of view─ is a self-made billionaire by the name of Christian Grey at age 27? Right. Just let that sink in for a moment. Anastasia Steele is a literary student first, then a college graduate,  and a virgin, who so far never even got drunk, had sex, or masturbated once in spite of some occasional hot thoughts...right!

But these two are attracted to each other to the extent that Ana, as he calls her, goes along with his S& M games willingly and…enjoys them from the get-go. Triple right!?

The book is eye-candy for voyeurs and, at least to me, unbelievable throughout, because guess what: This totally ordinary, stubborn and self-centered young girl is first shocked, intrigued, and, ultimately, repelled by Christian’s singular erotic tastes; then Ana demands a deeper commitment. You read that right.
Determined to keep her, Christian agrees. That easy! She changes  this Mr. S. &M. Incarnate into a loving husband and father. 

The writing style is bland and predictable, clichés abound. According to some  Kindle search function, characters roll their eyes 41 times, Ana bites her lip 35 times, Christian's lips "quirk up" 16 times, Christian "cocks his head to one side" 17 times, characters "purse" their lips 15 times, and characters raise their eyebrows a whopping 50 times. Banalities and profanities go on and on at this repetitious rate.

Call me an old fogey who begrudges female readers (and the majority of them are indeed women!) their sexual fantasies. The author, a mother of two, claims she wrote the book for female readers and their fantasies. Right. I admit there are millions of women who wish for a rich knight in shining armor  and apparently, in modern versions, they fly in on their own planes.  I fully realize that there is a huge readership of Erotica and S&M literature out there, judging from the amount of titles in that category popping up on Facebook writers groups alone. Some critics may be inclined to say “De gustibus…” and all that.

However, in a world increasingly full of female abuse and exploitation where even young girls are sold into sexual slavery, I find it dangerous to promote such fantasies. I find it irresponsible to pretend that somebody with extreme sexual behavior can be changed or dominated like in this book. Maybe I just missed out on a big exciting chapter in my life?

 

I admit to some jealousy being in play on my part when I wrote this review as I struggle to sell my book. Next Time Lucky in comparison has intelligent and witty passages, sprinkled with some sexy scenes, and is written out of a real life experience-- something that millions of divorced or single people can relate to.It's been labeled too raunchy for some.

But then again, I don't like paranormal, zombie or werewolf stories either, genres that people read to escape reality or for good old entertainment. Well, then... Suum cuique?
So, I will and cannot recommend 50 Shades. If you didn't like it either, contact me and I'll send you a FREE e-copy of my novel. Seriously.
Can’t wait to see how the movie is doing
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Comments welcome!

Siggy Buckley

Five Writing/Publishing Tips You Should NOT Follow

                I have some bad habits. I’ll share some of them with you. These are from the Don’t ever do this and the If you’re doing this – stop right now files.

1.           Never write a book using the method I’m about to describe. Every time I sit down to scribble away at my work in progress I begin back at the beginning. I start from the first line and revise away until I catch up to where I left off last time. Sometimes I get sidetracked in deleting or adding to a section and it can take a long, long time to reach the point where I progressed to last time. After ten or fifteen sittings I leave the first couple of chapters alone and begin at the third or fourth chapter until I catch up. It’s time consuming and laborious and probably not the most efficient use of my writing time. I seem to be stuck with this method; I just can’t shake it. There may still be time for you though.

2.     If you plan on writing a trilogy of books don’t tell anyone, especially your readers. I released my first book at the end of 2011. I was lucky; it was quite successful. The plan for my next project was to write a story that I’d had in my head for many years. My readers had other ideas though. They wanted to know more about Gerald Hardly McDougall, one of the characters from my first book. This was a true privilege. So, I decided to turn my single, stand-alone novel into a trilogy and wrote the second book of the trilogy. I was able to release that book – My Name Is Hardly, during 2012. It is now 2015 and book three, the third book in this well-intentioned trilogy is still a work in progress. If you’re going to write a trilogy or any type of series of books that involves the completion of the last book – keep the information to yourself.

3.     Don’t respond to reviews. I’ve done this and it did not end in a nightmare scenario, but it could have. As the wise sage said, reviews are for readers, not for writers. Read them, take the hit or the glory and move on.

4.     Be prepared to listen to the truth. Do not surround yourself with other authors who are only going to tell you of your brilliance. You probably are brilliant; we all display brilliant streaks from time to time, but it takes work to become a better writer. It’s more important for me to hear what I’m doing wrong than what I’m doing right. I want to know that my story has plot holes or characters that are unnecessary, and I want to make those changes before I expose my work to my readers. I want to release the best work I can and that means I need to hear the truth.

5.     There’s kind of a mental no-man’s land that I fall into when I’m not working on a book. The longer I’m between creations the deeper I sink into this land and the less relevant everything around me feels. I need to make up stories and tell those stories. Without that I’m not only incomplete, I’m incompatible, inconsolable, incon…I just don’t fit in. So, I need to write. I don’t always do this though. I sometimes devote hours of time to networking (yes, this involves Facebook), as I try to determine the best methods of promoting my work. This is important, but as a professional writer and self-publisher I need to write more than perform non-writing related tasks. So, I created a spreadsheet that helps me balance the work so that the majority of my working day is devoted to writing. My readers want new books, and that’s where my efforts should lie. A wise writer commented on a thread recently and observed that self-published authors who have hit those top levels and connected with thousands of readers have produced lots of words. They turn those words into books and then repeat the same process. Readers have a short attention span. If we can’t provide them with product they’ll go elsewhere, and they’ll forget about us. If there’s one thing we’ve learned in the last few years it’s that there are a lot of great writers out there. And, they’re producing some fantastic work. So, keep writing.

I have other bad habits but I’ll keep those to myself for now. If you’d like a copy of the spreadsheet I put together that helps me balance my writing versus non-writing time email me and I’ll gladly send it on. And, good luck connecting with your readers they’re out there!

Martin Crosbie 

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The Book of Mormon - The Hottest Show on Broadway

Called the hottest show on Broadway for the past 2 years, the musical was certainly a spectacle. When something that popular and well-reviewed comes to town, it is a must see. Although I'm not a big fan of musicals as a rule and very skeptical of anything related to religion and in particular the so-called Mormon faith, I felt compelled to go and see it.

Knowing that the producers of this musical are the makers of the animated comedy South Park, it won’t come as a surprise that The Book of Mormon is a religious satire musical. Warning: the musical is not for the fainthearted or those who see it as blasphemy to make fun of religion. However, it is an equal opportunity offender as it playfully pokes fun at religion, sexuality, poverty and race. The show plays fast and loose with explicit language.

The Book of Mormon tells the story of two young Mormon missionaries sent to a remote village in northern Uganda, where a brutal warlord is threatening the local population. Naïve and optimistic, the two missionaries try to share the Book of Mormon, one of their scriptures—which only one of them has read—but have trouble connecting with the locals, who are more worried about war, famine, poverty, and Aids than about religion.

The musical is loud, the singing sometimes hard to understand, especially when spectators around you are almost rolling in the aisles laughing or practically dancing in their seats. In spite of its blatant irreverence and disrespect of the religious book the spectator walks away on a positive note. The musical conveyed the idea that these young missionaries are dedicated and kind people who also spread the message of being kind to one another.   Although the Ugandans made up their own version of the Mormon religion by skewering and changing the message, it had a positive effect on them and improved their lives.

On approaching and leaving the theater, Mormon missionaries offered people who wanted to attend the musical a free copy of the real 'Book of Mormon'. I was surprised that the Church doesn’t boycott performances but on the contrary, does see it as an opportunity to cultivate relationships with everyone. Compliments to the Church that they have such grace and tolerance -  especially  in the light of Charlie Hebdo.

The Book of Mormon earned overwhelmingly positive critical response, and set records in ticket sales. It was awarded nine Tony Awards, one of which was for Best Musical, and a Grammy Award for Best Musical Theater Album. The original Broadway cast recording became the highest-charting Broadway cast album in over four decades, reaching number three on the Billboard charts. It has staged two national tours since it premiered in the West End in 2013.

Book, Music and Lyrics by Trey Parker, Robert Lopez and Matt Stone

Siggy Buckley
This article was published before on https://angiesdiary.com/lifestyle/entertainment/the-book-of-mormon/

BIN TO BESTSELLERS: THE IMPORTANCE OF OTHER PEOPLE IN YOUR WRITING LIFE

Making money writing is the hardest job on planet earth, however, there are people who do it effectively and make a living out of it. Being not one of them is not your problem, but aspiring not to be one is.

Is finding a publisher the best option for you as a writer? Richard Bach once mentioned in an interview; it’s not a publisher a writer searches for, but an editor. This relationship is one that should last for a lifetime. An editor understands where the music of words has to be slowed down or where it must run faster. But to get one worthy enough, you must do a lifetime’s waiting.

As a beginner in freelancing and in professional writing, how do you get an editor whose service can be worthwhile? Beginners are always stuck with the same problem; lack of funds. This in turn hampers your look out for an editor. Good editors are sale items with relatively high price money. There are many writers’ communities that offer editing services. Even some literary agencies offer you with editing services. However, if you are a first timer and one without enough weight in your bank account, hiring an editor for your book or manuscript will not be, normally, easy.

The best way to tackle this situation is to find reliable and easy options for editors. One need not go much farther for this end. Just look around and you will find yourself to be blessed with many minds, gifted with the one serum of eternal life—love—around you, ready to help reading your manuscript.

Showing your manuscript to your friends and family or girl friend would be a better option. In such a case, the money spent would be much close to null on editing services. The best editors are those who actually care for our work. You must be open to their criticisms; however, in harsh criticisms you can always rely on their lack of professional experience as the hideout from humiliation.

Stephen King, when he wrote his first novel, Carrie, did not think it would make up to the publishing standards and threw it into the bin. But his wife Tabitha King accidentally discovered the manuscript and read it. Thinking that it would be something worth of a quality, she put it back on the table and later helped King to rework on it. The novel went to become a best seller of its times and was made into a successful Hollywood movie.

This is one real life example from the life of America’s most celebrated and enthusiastic writer, Stephen King. This could be yours too. A relationship not just helps an individual to maintain one’s emotional health but the creative output as well. Now wait your sweet heart to tell you where to put the period.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Anu Lal is the author of Wall of Colors and Other Stories. His latest book is Clenched Hands, Bloody Nails.  You can catch up with him in Facebook too.  

Three Crows

THREE BLACK CROWS STAND SENTRY

THREE BLACK CROWS MOTIONLESS

WATCHING THE WAVES AT A DISTANCE                 

  

AT A DARK, BLACK, TIDAL DISTANCE

THE WAVES THREATEN THEM AS THEY WATCH

ROLLING IN, THEN ROLLING OUT AGAIN

THREE BLACK CROWS STAND ON THE TIDAL LINE

LOOKING WARILY, WHAT ARE THEY WAITING FOR ?

WOULD YOUR EYE'S HAVE NOTICED THEIR VIGIL ?

I SAW THEM, WHAT ARE THEY PLANNING ?

IS THERE GOOD VICTUALS TO BE HAD ON THE TIDAL LINE  ?

OR IS THIS THEIR MASON DIXON ?

THREE CROWS WAITING DRESSED IN SUNDAY BLACK

IT'S A DARK CLOUDY, RAINY DAY FOR WAITING

IS THERE SOMETHING COMING, SOMETHING DARK ?

SHOULD I BE WAITING, WATCHING WITH THEM ?

SHOULD WE ALL BE WATCHING ?

WHAT IS THE VIGIL FOR ? A BEACH VIGIL

THREE BLACK CROWS ONE ON A BRANCH

JUST OFF THE FLOOR BY ABOUT A LOOK-OUT FOOT

AS IF IT WAS HIS TURN TO BE THE LOOK-OUT

AS IF THEY HAVE DONE THIS BEFORE, HIS TURN ?

I WATCHED UNTIL IT RAINED HEAVILY AND THEN RETREATED

BUT THEY STAYED, I LEFT , BUT THEY STAYED WATCHING

MAYBE THEY'RE STILL THERE, MAYBE NOT

THREE BLACK CROWS MOTIONLESS ON THE ESTUARY WATER-LINE

WATCHING, WHY ?

Tim Williams

Tim Williams was born and brought up in the coal mining valleys of south Wales and did various jobs over the years mainly in the antiques trade. Has been a singer songwriter for 35 years, 3 years ago tried his hand at poetry as opposed to song lyrics; having a little success started performing his poetry at festivals and gig's around Wales. He has had a few poems published in books and on websites both here in UK, won an award in Milan Italy in 2014 and has had a few published in USA on websites there. He has his first book of poems due out this spring entitled " Are you reading that poetry book your sitting on ". He has a Facebook site Tim Williams Welsh Poet and features on Cosmofunnel an American poetry and writing site.